This is to notify that the blogs that are to be published as of now are solely for the exclusive reading pleasure of the author's close friends from college, which only include magneta, meenakshy, sweetliar, ethnicsoul, rahi30384, zoyanits & sreejith, and who ever from the realm of the wide wide net who does not study along with the author in the Department of Civil Engineering, College Of Engineering Trivandrum. So anyone who does not meet with the following criteria please do not enter the premises of the following internet web log.
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Monday, August 29, 2005
>Leading the way to the new generation XploCivZ
So its exam season again. But one has to say an engineering course over do's it a little bit. As one looks back to the good old days, in the '02 year,we as freshers sat for our series exams, so afraid, so sure that this was the motive of our lives, the very core of our existance and now we now understand how far away from the truth we really were, atleast most us do.
My first exam may not be the perfect example, with chala passing me a whole 40 marks sheet helping me secure 70 in the first series math exam. The spectacle was fortuanately or unfortunately not repeated for the second series with me confined to a meagre 8 out of 100, which thankfully the poor math proffesor did not deem important enought to deny me the luxury of above 35 out of 50 for internals. But luck held strong during the S1S2 exams, with an unbelievable number of 'on the brink' scores and a KU concocted conditional clause, which ceremoniously crawls into most of my miraculous university esacapades. The thread of singe digit math marks adorned all my internal exam marklists, 7 and 3 for the third semester ,8 something in the fourth. But being cheated out of a conditional pass in FM in the third because of math finally persuaded me to go for math tutions and that dragged me into the mid fifties for math in the universities.
Then comes the day the internals are out, everyone going mad, not as much out of the concern for their marks but more out of the frustration of finding out again and again that the department has yet again managed not to put up the marks at all with the exam right upon our heads. My marks are never a surprise, with it staying within the safe limit of 2-4 undersessionals, which in by no way unfair. (*But guys let me say ,you can never stress the importance of sessionals.*)
Writing exams were always fun for me. But for all the wrong reasons. It could be said that I like it for more of the not writing part that the writing part. Pitt had high expectations for me , and so did Madhavan with me beating them out of the exam hall in every one of the 9 theory exams, but again fortunately or unfortunately i let them all down with me filing not even one suppli. So that was a big surprise for everyone.
So now that I am in S7, with the first series underway I find myself in a pivotal position( and nostalgic too) from where to influence a lot of raw and extremely impressionable young minds, in the form of the third semester juniors. They need guidance, spiritual guidance , well....I figure they need a role model!! So tomorrow ,I'm shedding all the pretense of decent ,well dressed responsible young adult male and reverting back to my original self ,though not to the original full glory , back to those torn and loud t's and unbelievable jeans and going to retire from the exam battleground within 15 minutes of the battle horns being blown.
ME the LONE WARRIOR >>> IIII STAND ALLOOOONNEEEE!!!!!
My first exam may not be the perfect example, with chala passing me a whole 40 marks sheet helping me secure 70 in the first series math exam. The spectacle was fortuanately or unfortunately not repeated for the second series with me confined to a meagre 8 out of 100, which thankfully the poor math proffesor did not deem important enought to deny me the luxury of above 35 out of 50 for internals. But luck held strong during the S1S2 exams, with an unbelievable number of 'on the brink' scores and a KU concocted conditional clause, which ceremoniously crawls into most of my miraculous university esacapades. The thread of singe digit math marks adorned all my internal exam marklists, 7 and 3 for the third semester ,8 something in the fourth. But being cheated out of a conditional pass in FM in the third because of math finally persuaded me to go for math tutions and that dragged me into the mid fifties for math in the universities.
Then comes the day the internals are out, everyone going mad, not as much out of the concern for their marks but more out of the frustration of finding out again and again that the department has yet again managed not to put up the marks at all with the exam right upon our heads. My marks are never a surprise, with it staying within the safe limit of 2-4 undersessionals, which in by no way unfair. (*But guys let me say ,you can never stress the importance of sessionals.*)
Writing exams were always fun for me. But for all the wrong reasons. It could be said that I like it for more of the not writing part that the writing part. Pitt had high expectations for me , and so did Madhavan with me beating them out of the exam hall in every one of the 9 theory exams, but again fortunately or unfortunately i let them all down with me filing not even one suppli. So that was a big surprise for everyone.
So now that I am in S7, with the first series underway I find myself in a pivotal position( and nostalgic too) from where to influence a lot of raw and extremely impressionable young minds, in the form of the third semester juniors. They need guidance, spiritual guidance , well....I figure they need a role model!! So tomorrow ,I'm shedding all the pretense of decent ,well dressed responsible young adult male and reverting back to my original self ,though not to the original full glory , back to those torn and loud t's and unbelievable jeans and going to retire from the exam battleground within 15 minutes of the battle horns being blown.
ME the LONE WARRIOR >>> IIII STAND ALLOOOONNEEEE!!!!!
Monday, August 15, 2005
How to make an H-Bomb at home
Making and owning an H-bomb is the kind of challenge real Indians seek. Who wants to be a passive victim of nuclear war when, with a little effort, you can be an active participant? Bomb shelters are for losers. Who wants to huddle together underground eating canned Spam? Winners want to push the button themselves. Making your own H-bomb is a big step in nuclear assertiveness training -- it's called Taking Charge. We're sure you'll enjoy the risks and the heady thrill of playing nuclear chicken.
Not I support nuclear terrorism. I do not. I would prefer to die slowly from familiar poisons like low-level radiation, microwaves, DDT, DBCP, aflatoxins, PBBs, PBCs, or food dyes, rather than unexpectedly, say as hostage to a Latvian nationalist brandishing a homemade bomb. In my view the real terrorists are the governments, American, Soviet, French, Chinese, and British, that are hoarding H-bombs for their own use, and worse still, those governments (U.S., French and German) that are eagerly peddling advanced nuclear technology to countries like South Africa, Brazil, and Argentina so that they can make their own bombs. When these bombs are used, and they will be, it will be the world's big-time nuclear peddlers, along with corporate suppliers like General Electric, Westinghouse, and Gulf Oil, that we can thank for it. Gagging The Progressive will do no more for national security than backyard bomb shelters because like it or not the news is out.
Part 1: Making Your Bomb
The heart of the successful H-bomb is the successful A-bomb. Once you've got your A-bombs made the rest is frosting on the cake. All you have to do is set them up so that when they detonate they'll start off a hydrogen-fusion reaction.
Step 1: Getting the Ingredients
Uranium is the basic ingredient of the A-bomb. When a uranium atom's nucleus splits apart, it releases a tremendous amount of energy (for its size), and it emits neutrons which go on to split other nearby uranium nuclei, releasing more energy, in what is called a "chain reaction." (When atoms split, matter is converted into energy according to Einstein's equation E=MC2. What better way to mark his birthday than with your own atomic fireworks?)
There are two kinds (isotopes) of uranium: the rare U-235, used in bombs, and the more common, heavier, but useless U-238. Natural uranium contains less than 1 percent U-235 and in order to be usable in bombs it has to be "enriched" to 90 percent U-235 and only 10 percent U-238. Plutonium-239 can also be used in bombs as a substitute for U-235. Ten pounds of U-235 (or slightly less plutonium) is all that is necessary for a bomb. Less than ten pounds won't give you a critical mass. So purifying or enriching naturally occurring uranium is likely to be your first big hurdle. It is infinitely easy to steal ready-to-use enriched uranium or plutonium than to enrich some yourself. And stealing uranium is not as hard as it sounds.
There are at least three sources of enriched uranium or plutonium...
Enriched uranium is manufactured at a gaseous diffusion plant in Portsmouth, Ohio. From there it is shipped in 10 liter bottles by airplane and trucks to conversion plants that turn it into uranium oxide or uranium metal. Each 10 liter bottle contains 7 kilograms of U-235, and there are 20 bottles to a typical shipment. Conversion facilities exist at Hematite, Missouri; Apollo, Pennsylvania; and Erwin, Tennessee.
The Kerr-McGee plant at Crescent Oklahoma -- where Karen Silkwood worked -- was a conversion plant that "lost" 40 lbs of plutonium. Enriched uranium can be stolen from these plants or from fuel-fabricating plants like those in New Haven, San Diego; or Lynchburg, Virginia. (A former Kerr-McGee supervisor, James V. Smith, when asked at the Silkwood trial if there were any security precautions at the plant to prevent theft, testified that "There were none of any kind, no guards, no fences, no nothing.")
Plutonium can be obtained from places like United Nuclear in Pawling, New York; Nuclear Fuel Services in Erwin, Tennessee; General Electric in Pleasanton, California; Westinghouse in Cheswick, Pennsylvania; Nuclear Materials and Equipment Corporation (NUMEC) in Leechburg, Pennsylvania; and plants in Hanfford, Washington and Morris, Illinois. According to Rolling Stone magazine the Israelis were involved in the theft of plutonium from NUMEC.
Finally you can steal enriched uranium or plutonium while it's en-route from conversion plants to fuel fabricating plants. It is usually transported (by air or truck) in the form of uranium oxide, a brownish powder resembling instant coffee, or as a metal, coming in small chunks called "broken buttons." Both forms are shipped in small cans stacked in 5-inch cylinders braced with welded struts in the center of ordinary 55 gallon steel drums. The drums weigh about 100 pounds and are clearly marked "Fissible Material" or "Danger, Plutonium." A typical shipment might go from the enrichment plant at Portsmouth, Ohio to the conversion plant in Hematite Missouri then to Kansas City by truck where it would be flown to Los Angeles and then trucked down to the General Atomic plant in San Diego. The plans for the General Atomic plant are on file at the Nuclear Regulatory Commission's reading room at 1717 H Street NW Washington. A Xerox machine is provided for the convenience of the public.
If you can't get hold of any enriched uranium you'll have to settle for commercial grade (20 percent U-235). This can be stolen from university reactors of a type called TRIGA Mark II, where security is even more casual than at commercial plants.
If stealing uranium seems too tacky, you can buy it. Unenriched uranium is available at any chemical supply house for $23 a pound. Commercial grade (3 to 20 percent enriched) is available for $40 a pound from Gulf Atomic. You'll have to enrich it further yourself. Quite frankly this can be something of a pain in the ass. You'll need to start with a little more than 50 pounds of commercial-grade uranium. (It's only 20 percent U-235 at best, and you need 10 pounds of U-235 so... ) But with a little kitchen-table chemistry you'll be able to convert the solid uranium oxide you've purchased into a liquid form. Once you've done that, you'll be able to separate the U-235 that you'll need from the U-238.
First pour a few gallons of concentrated hydrofluoric acid into your uranium oxide, converting it to uranium tetrafluoride. (Safety note: Concentrated hydrofluoric acid is so corrosive that it will eat its way through glass, so store it only in plastic. Used 1-gallon plastic milk containers will do.) Now you have to convert your uranium tetrafluoride to uranium hexafluoride, the gaseous form of uranium, which is convenient for separating out the isotope U-235 from U-238.
To get the hexafluoride form, bubble fluorine gas into your container of uranium tetrafluoride. Fluorine is available in pressurized tanks from chemical-supply firms. Be careful how you use it though because fluorine is several times more deadly than chlorine, the classic World War I poison gas. Chemists recommend that you carry out this step under a stove hood (the kind used to remove unpleasant cooking odors).
If you've done your chemistry right you should now have a generous supply of uranium hexafluoride ready for enriching. In the old horse-and-buggy days of A-bomb manufacture the enrichment was carried out by passing the uranium hexafluoride through hundreds of miles of pipes, tubes, and membranes, until the U-235 was eventually separated from the U-238. This gaseous-diffusion process, as it was called is difficult, time-consuming, and expensive. Gaseous-diffusion plants cover hundreds of acres and cost in the neighborhood of $2-billion each. So forget it. There are easier, and cheaper, ways to enrich your uranium.
First transform the gas into a liquid by subjecting it to pressure. You can use a bicycle pump for this. Then make a simple home centrifuge. Fill a standard-size bucket one-quarter full of liquid uranium hexafluoride. Attach a six-foot rope to the bucket handle. Now swing the rope (and attached bucket) around your head as fast as possible. Keep this up for about 45 minutes. Slow down gradually, and very gently put the bucket on the floor. The U-235, which is lighter, will have risen to the top, where it can be skimmed off like cream. Repeat this step until you have the required 10 pounds of uranium. (Safety note: Don't put all your enriched uranium hexafluoride in one bucket. Use at least two or three buckets and keep them in separate corners of the room. This will prevent the premature build-up of a critical mass.)
Now it's time to convert your enriched uranium back to metal form. This is easily enough accomplished by spooning several ladlefuls of calcium (available in tablet form from your drugstore) into each bucket of uranium. The calcium will react with the uranium hexafluoride to produce calcium fluoride, a colorless salt which can be easily be separated from your pure enriched uranium metal. (Safety note: Even though it is a salt, keep it away from your kitchen's spice rack.)
A few precautions:
* While uranium is not dangerously radioactive in the amounts you'll be handling, if you plan to make more than one bomb it might be wise to wear gloves and a lead apron, the kind you can buy in dental supply stores.
* Plutonium is one of the most toxic substances known. If inhaled, a thousandth of a gram can cause massive fibrosis of the lungs, a painful way to go. Even a millionth of a gram in the lungs will cause cancer. If eaten, plutonium is metabolized like calcium. It goes straight to the bones where it gives out alpha particles preventing bone marrow from manufacturing red blood cells. The best way to avoid inhaling plutonium is to hold your breath while handling it. If this is too difficult, wear a mask. To avoid ingesting plutonium orally follow this simple rule: never make an A-bomb on an empty stomach.
* If you find yourself dozing off while you're working, or if you begin to glow in the dark, it might be wise to take a blood count. Prick your finger with a sterile pin, place a drop of blood on a microscope slide, cover it with a cover slip, and examine under a microscope. (Best results are obtained in the early morning.) When you get leukemia, immature cells are released into the bloodstream, and usually the number of white cells increases (though this increase might take almost 2 weeks). Red blood cells look kind of like donuts (without the hole), and are slightly smaller than the white cells, each of which has a nucleus. Immature red cells look similar to white cells (i.e.. slightly larger and have a nucleus). If you have more than about 1 white cell (including immature ones) to 400 red cells then start to worry. But, depending upon your plans for the eventual use of the bomb, a short life expectancy might not be a problem.
Step 2: Assembling the A-Bomb
Now that you've acquired the enriched uranium, all that's left is to assemble your A-bomb. Go find a couple of stainless steel salad bowls. You also want to separate your 10 pounds of U-235 into two hunks. (Keep them apart!) The idea is to push each half your uranium into the inside of a bowl.
Take one hunk of your uranium and beat it into the inside of the first bowl. Uranium is malleable, like gold, so you should have no trouble hammering it into the bowl to get a good fit. Take another five-pound hunk of uranium and fit it into a second stainless steel bowl. These two bowls of U-235 are the "subcritical masses" which, when brought together forcefully, will provide the critical mass that makes your A-bomb go. Keep them a respectful distance apart while working because you don't want them to "go critical" on you... At least not yet.
Now hollow out the body of an old canister-type vacuum cleaner and place your two hemispherical bowls inside, open ends facing each other, no less than seven inches apart, using masking tape to set them up in position. The reason for the steel bowls and the vacuum cleaner, in case you're wondering, is that these help reflect the neutrons back into the uranium for a more efficient explosion. "A loose neutron is a useless neutron" as the A-bomb pioneers used to say.
As far as the A-bomb goes, you're almost done. The final problem is to figure out how to get the two U-235 hemispheres to smash into each other with sufficient force to set off a truly effective fission reaction. Almost any type of explosive can be used to drive them together. Gunpowder, for example, is easily made at home from potassium nitrate, sulfur, and carbon. Or, you can get some blasting caps or TNT. (Buy them or steal them from a construction site.) Best of all is C4 plastic explosive. You can mold it around your bowls, and it's fairly safe to work with. (But, it might be wise to shape it around an extra salad bowl in another room, and THEN fit it to your uranium-packed bowls. This is particularly true in winter, when a stray static electrical charge might induce ignition in the C4. A responsible bomb maker considers it impolite to accidentally destroy more of the neighborhood than absolutely necessary.)
Once the explosives are in place all you need to do is hook up a simple detonation device with a few batteries, a switch, and some wire. Remember though that it is essential that the two charges -- one on each side of the casing -- go off simultaneously.
Now put the whole thing in the casing of an old Hoover vacuum cleaner and you're finished with this part of the process.
The rest is easy.
Step 3: Make More A-Bombs Following the Directions Above
You'll need a total of at least four.
A Word to the Wise About Wastes
After your A-bomb is completed you'll have a pile of moderately fatal radioactive wastes like U-238. These are not dangerous, but you do have to get rid of them. You can flush leftovers down the toilet. (Don't worry about polluting the ocean, there is already so much radioactive waste there, a few more bucketfuls won't make any waves whatsoever.) If you're the fastidious type -- the kind who never leaves gum under their seat at the movies -- you can seal the nasty stuff in coffee cans and bury it in the backyard, just like Uncle Sam does. If the neighbor kids have a habit of trampling the lawn, tell them to play over by the waste. You'll soon find that they're spending most of their time in bed.
Going First Class
If you're like us, you're feeling the economic pinch, and you'll want to make your bomb as inexpensively as possible, consonant of course with reasonable yield. The recipe we've given is for a budget-pleasing H-bomb, no frills, no flourishes; it's just a simple 5-megaton bomb, capable of wiping out the New York metropolitan area, the San Francisco Bay area, or Boston. But don't forget, your H-bomb will only be as good as the A-bombs in it.
If you want to spend a little more money you can punch-up your A-bomb considerably. Instead of centrifuging your uranium by hand, you can buy a commercial centrifuge. (Fisher Scientific sells one for about $1000.) You also might want to be fussier about your design. The Hiroshima bomb, a relatively crude one, only fissioned 1 percent of it's uranium and yielded only 13 kilotons. In order to fission more of the uranium, the force of your explosive "trigger" needs to be evenly diffused around the sphere; the same pressure has to be exerted on every point of the sphere simultaneously. (It was a technique for producing this sort of simultaneous detonation by fashioning the explosives into lenses that the government accused Julius and Ethel Rosenberg of trying to steal).
Part 2: Putting Your H-Bomb Together
The heart of the H-bomb is the fusion process. Several A-bombs are detonated in such a way as to create the extremely high temperature (100 million degrees C) necessary to fuse lithium deuteride (LiD) into helium. When the lithium nucleus slams into the deuterium nucleus, two helium nuclei are created, and if this happens to enough deuterium nuclei rapidly enough, the result is an enormous amount of energy: the energy of the H-bomb. You don't have to worry about stealing lithium deuteride, it can be purchased from any chemical-supply house. It costs $1000 a pound. If your budget won't allow it you can substitute lithium hydride at $40 a pound. You will need at least 100 pounds. It's a corrosive and toxic powder so be careful.
Place the lithium deuteride or hydride in glass jars and surround it with four A-bombs in their casings. Attach them to the same detonator so that they will go off simultaneously. The container for the whole thing is no problem. They can be placed anywhere: Inside an old stereo console, a discarded refrigerator, etc...
When the detonator sets off the four A-bombs all eight hemispheres of fissionable material will slam into each other at the same time creating four critical masses and four detonations. This will raise the temperature of the lithium deuteride to 100 million degrees C fast enough (a few billionths of a second) so that the lithium will not be blown all over the neighborhood before the nuclei have time to fuse. The result, at least 1000 times the punch of the puny A-bomb that leveled Hiroshima (20 million tons of TNT vs. 20 thousand tons.)
Part 3: What to do With Your Bomb
Now that you have a fully assembled H-bomb housed in an attractive console of your choice you may be wondering, "What should I do with it?" Every family will have to answer this question according to its own tastes and preferences, but you may want to explore some possibilities which have been successfully pioneered by the American government.
1. Sell Your Bomb and Make a Pile of Money
In these days of rising inflation, increasing unemployment, and an uncertain economic outlook, few businesses make as much sense as weapons production. If your career forecast is cloudy, bomb sales may be the only sure way to avoid the humiliation of receiving welfare, or unemployment. Regardless of your present income level, a home H-bomb business can be an invaluable income supplement, and certainly a profitable alternative to selling Tupperware or pirated Girl Scout cookies.
Unfortunately for the family bomb business, big government has already cornered a large part of the world market. But this does not mean that there is a shortage of potential customers. The raid on Entebee was the Waterloo of hijacking, and many nationalist groups are now on the alert for new means to get their message across. They'd jump at the chance to get hold of an H-bomb. Emerging nations which can't ante up enough rice or sugar to buy themselves a reactor from G.E. or Westinghouse are also shopping around.
You may wonder about the ethics of selling to nations, or groups, whose goals you may disapprove of. But here again, take a tip from our government: forget ideology -- it's cash that counts. And remember, H-bomb sales have a way of escalating, almost like a chain reaction. Suppose you make a sale to South Yemen which you believe to be a Soviet puppet. Well within a few days some discrete inquiries from North Yemen and possibly the Saudis, the Egyptians and the Ethiopians as well can be expected. Similarly, a sale to the IRA will generate a sale to the Ulster government; and a sale to the Tanzanians will bring the Ugandans running, and so forth.
It doesn't matter WHICH side you're on, only how many sides there are. Don't forget about the possibility of repeat sales to the same customer. As the experience of both the U.S. and the U.S.S.R. has shown, each individual nation has a potentially infinite need for H-bombs. No customer -- no matter how small -- can ever have too many.
2. Use Your Bomb at Home
Many families are attracted to the H-bomb simply as a "deterrent." A discrete sticker on the door or on the living room window saying "This Home Protected by H-bomb" will discourage IRS investigators, census takers, and Jehovah's Witnesses. You'll be surprised how fast the crime rate will go down and property values will go up. And once the news gets out that you are a home H-bomb owner you'll find that you have unexpected leverage in neighborhood disputes over everything from parking places and stereo noise levels to school tax rates. So relax and enjoy the pride and excitement of home H-bomb ownership!
Is It For You?
Let's be honest. The H-bomb isn't for everyone. Frankly there are people who can't handle it. They break out in hives at the very mention of mega-death, fallout, or radiation sickness.
The following quiz will help you find out whether you have what it takes for home H-bomb ownership. If you can answer "yes" to six or more of these questions, then you're emotionally eligible to join the nuclear club. If not, a more conventional weapon may be more your cup of tea, try botulism-toxin, laser rays, or nerve gas.
1. I ignore the demands of others.
2. I subscribe to one or more of the following: Soldier of Fortune, Hustler, Popular Mechanics, Self.
3. Though I have many interesting acquaintances, I am my own best friend.
4. I know what to say after you say "Hello," but I am seldom interested in pursuing the conversation.
5. I have seen the movie "The Deer Hunter" more than once.
6. I know that everyone can be a winner if they want to, and I resent whiners.
7. I own one or more of the following: handgun, video game, trash compactor, snowmobile.
8. I am convinced that leukemia is psychosomatic.
9. I am aware that most vegetarians are sexually impotent.
10. I have read evidence that solar energy is a Communist conspiracy.
Myths About Nuclear War
Ever since the first mushroom cloud over Hiroshima ushered in the atomic age, a small group of nay-sayers and doom-mongers has lobbied, campaigned and demonstrated to convince Americans that H-bomb ownership, along with nuclear power, is dangerous and unhealthy. Using their virtual stranglehold over the media, these people have tried to discredit everything nuclear from energy to war. They have vastly overrated the risks of nuclear bombs and left many Americans feeling demoralized and indecisive; not sure where the truth lies. Well, here are the myths, and here are the facts.
Myth: After a nuclear exchange the earth will no longer be suitable for human habitation.
Fact: This is completely false. According to one scientist (quoted in John McPee's The Curve of Binding Energy) "The largest bomb that has ever been exploded anywhere was 60 megatons, and that is one-thousandth the force of an earthquake, one-thousandth the force of a hurricane. We have lived with earthquakes and hurricanes for a long time." Another scientist adds, "It is often assumed that a full blown nuclear war would be the end of life on earth. That is far from the truth. To end life on earth would take at least a thousand times the total yield of all the nuclear explosives existing in the world, and probably a lot more." Even if humans succumbed, many forms of life would survive a nuclear free-for-all, cockroaches, certain forms of bacteria, and lichens, for instance.
Myth: Radiation is bad for you.
Fact: Everything is bad for you if you have too much of it. If you eat too many bananas you'll get a stomach-ache. If you get too much sun you can get sunburned (or even skin cancer). Same thing with radiation. Too much may make you feel under the weather, but nuclear industry officials insist that there is no evidence that low-level radiation has any really serious adverse effects. And, high-level radiation may bring unexpected benefits. It speeds up evolution by weeding out unwanted genetic types and creating new ones. (Remember the old saying, "Two heads are better than one.") Nearer to home, it's plain that radiation will get rid of pesky crab grass and weeds, and teenagers will find that brief exposure to a nuclear burst vaporizes acne and other skin blemishes. (Many survivors of the Hiroshima bomb found that they were free from skin and its attendant problems forever.)
We hope this clears up any misconceptions you may have had. Enjoy your H-Bomb!
Not I support nuclear terrorism. I do not. I would prefer to die slowly from familiar poisons like low-level radiation, microwaves, DDT, DBCP, aflatoxins, PBBs, PBCs, or food dyes, rather than unexpectedly, say as hostage to a Latvian nationalist brandishing a homemade bomb. In my view the real terrorists are the governments, American, Soviet, French, Chinese, and British, that are hoarding H-bombs for their own use, and worse still, those governments (U.S., French and German) that are eagerly peddling advanced nuclear technology to countries like South Africa, Brazil, and Argentina so that they can make their own bombs. When these bombs are used, and they will be, it will be the world's big-time nuclear peddlers, along with corporate suppliers like General Electric, Westinghouse, and Gulf Oil, that we can thank for it. Gagging The Progressive will do no more for national security than backyard bomb shelters because like it or not the news is out.
Part 1: Making Your Bomb
The heart of the successful H-bomb is the successful A-bomb. Once you've got your A-bombs made the rest is frosting on the cake. All you have to do is set them up so that when they detonate they'll start off a hydrogen-fusion reaction.
Step 1: Getting the Ingredients
Uranium is the basic ingredient of the A-bomb. When a uranium atom's nucleus splits apart, it releases a tremendous amount of energy (for its size), and it emits neutrons which go on to split other nearby uranium nuclei, releasing more energy, in what is called a "chain reaction." (When atoms split, matter is converted into energy according to Einstein's equation E=MC2. What better way to mark his birthday than with your own atomic fireworks?)
There are two kinds (isotopes) of uranium: the rare U-235, used in bombs, and the more common, heavier, but useless U-238. Natural uranium contains less than 1 percent U-235 and in order to be usable in bombs it has to be "enriched" to 90 percent U-235 and only 10 percent U-238. Plutonium-239 can also be used in bombs as a substitute for U-235. Ten pounds of U-235 (or slightly less plutonium) is all that is necessary for a bomb. Less than ten pounds won't give you a critical mass. So purifying or enriching naturally occurring uranium is likely to be your first big hurdle. It is infinitely easy to steal ready-to-use enriched uranium or plutonium than to enrich some yourself. And stealing uranium is not as hard as it sounds.
There are at least three sources of enriched uranium or plutonium...
Enriched uranium is manufactured at a gaseous diffusion plant in Portsmouth, Ohio. From there it is shipped in 10 liter bottles by airplane and trucks to conversion plants that turn it into uranium oxide or uranium metal. Each 10 liter bottle contains 7 kilograms of U-235, and there are 20 bottles to a typical shipment. Conversion facilities exist at Hematite, Missouri; Apollo, Pennsylvania; and Erwin, Tennessee.
The Kerr-McGee plant at Crescent Oklahoma -- where Karen Silkwood worked -- was a conversion plant that "lost" 40 lbs of plutonium. Enriched uranium can be stolen from these plants or from fuel-fabricating plants like those in New Haven, San Diego; or Lynchburg, Virginia. (A former Kerr-McGee supervisor, James V. Smith, when asked at the Silkwood trial if there were any security precautions at the plant to prevent theft, testified that "There were none of any kind, no guards, no fences, no nothing.")
Plutonium can be obtained from places like United Nuclear in Pawling, New York; Nuclear Fuel Services in Erwin, Tennessee; General Electric in Pleasanton, California; Westinghouse in Cheswick, Pennsylvania; Nuclear Materials and Equipment Corporation (NUMEC) in Leechburg, Pennsylvania; and plants in Hanfford, Washington and Morris, Illinois. According to Rolling Stone magazine the Israelis were involved in the theft of plutonium from NUMEC.
Finally you can steal enriched uranium or plutonium while it's en-route from conversion plants to fuel fabricating plants. It is usually transported (by air or truck) in the form of uranium oxide, a brownish powder resembling instant coffee, or as a metal, coming in small chunks called "broken buttons." Both forms are shipped in small cans stacked in 5-inch cylinders braced with welded struts in the center of ordinary 55 gallon steel drums. The drums weigh about 100 pounds and are clearly marked "Fissible Material" or "Danger, Plutonium." A typical shipment might go from the enrichment plant at Portsmouth, Ohio to the conversion plant in Hematite Missouri then to Kansas City by truck where it would be flown to Los Angeles and then trucked down to the General Atomic plant in San Diego. The plans for the General Atomic plant are on file at the Nuclear Regulatory Commission's reading room at 1717 H Street NW Washington. A Xerox machine is provided for the convenience of the public.
If you can't get hold of any enriched uranium you'll have to settle for commercial grade (20 percent U-235). This can be stolen from university reactors of a type called TRIGA Mark II, where security is even more casual than at commercial plants.
If stealing uranium seems too tacky, you can buy it. Unenriched uranium is available at any chemical supply house for $23 a pound. Commercial grade (3 to 20 percent enriched) is available for $40 a pound from Gulf Atomic. You'll have to enrich it further yourself. Quite frankly this can be something of a pain in the ass. You'll need to start with a little more than 50 pounds of commercial-grade uranium. (It's only 20 percent U-235 at best, and you need 10 pounds of U-235 so... ) But with a little kitchen-table chemistry you'll be able to convert the solid uranium oxide you've purchased into a liquid form. Once you've done that, you'll be able to separate the U-235 that you'll need from the U-238.
First pour a few gallons of concentrated hydrofluoric acid into your uranium oxide, converting it to uranium tetrafluoride. (Safety note: Concentrated hydrofluoric acid is so corrosive that it will eat its way through glass, so store it only in plastic. Used 1-gallon plastic milk containers will do.) Now you have to convert your uranium tetrafluoride to uranium hexafluoride, the gaseous form of uranium, which is convenient for separating out the isotope U-235 from U-238.
To get the hexafluoride form, bubble fluorine gas into your container of uranium tetrafluoride. Fluorine is available in pressurized tanks from chemical-supply firms. Be careful how you use it though because fluorine is several times more deadly than chlorine, the classic World War I poison gas. Chemists recommend that you carry out this step under a stove hood (the kind used to remove unpleasant cooking odors).
If you've done your chemistry right you should now have a generous supply of uranium hexafluoride ready for enriching. In the old horse-and-buggy days of A-bomb manufacture the enrichment was carried out by passing the uranium hexafluoride through hundreds of miles of pipes, tubes, and membranes, until the U-235 was eventually separated from the U-238. This gaseous-diffusion process, as it was called is difficult, time-consuming, and expensive. Gaseous-diffusion plants cover hundreds of acres and cost in the neighborhood of $2-billion each. So forget it. There are easier, and cheaper, ways to enrich your uranium.
First transform the gas into a liquid by subjecting it to pressure. You can use a bicycle pump for this. Then make a simple home centrifuge. Fill a standard-size bucket one-quarter full of liquid uranium hexafluoride. Attach a six-foot rope to the bucket handle. Now swing the rope (and attached bucket) around your head as fast as possible. Keep this up for about 45 minutes. Slow down gradually, and very gently put the bucket on the floor. The U-235, which is lighter, will have risen to the top, where it can be skimmed off like cream. Repeat this step until you have the required 10 pounds of uranium. (Safety note: Don't put all your enriched uranium hexafluoride in one bucket. Use at least two or three buckets and keep them in separate corners of the room. This will prevent the premature build-up of a critical mass.)
Now it's time to convert your enriched uranium back to metal form. This is easily enough accomplished by spooning several ladlefuls of calcium (available in tablet form from your drugstore) into each bucket of uranium. The calcium will react with the uranium hexafluoride to produce calcium fluoride, a colorless salt which can be easily be separated from your pure enriched uranium metal. (Safety note: Even though it is a salt, keep it away from your kitchen's spice rack.)
A few precautions:
* While uranium is not dangerously radioactive in the amounts you'll be handling, if you plan to make more than one bomb it might be wise to wear gloves and a lead apron, the kind you can buy in dental supply stores.
* Plutonium is one of the most toxic substances known. If inhaled, a thousandth of a gram can cause massive fibrosis of the lungs, a painful way to go. Even a millionth of a gram in the lungs will cause cancer. If eaten, plutonium is metabolized like calcium. It goes straight to the bones where it gives out alpha particles preventing bone marrow from manufacturing red blood cells. The best way to avoid inhaling plutonium is to hold your breath while handling it. If this is too difficult, wear a mask. To avoid ingesting plutonium orally follow this simple rule: never make an A-bomb on an empty stomach.
* If you find yourself dozing off while you're working, or if you begin to glow in the dark, it might be wise to take a blood count. Prick your finger with a sterile pin, place a drop of blood on a microscope slide, cover it with a cover slip, and examine under a microscope. (Best results are obtained in the early morning.) When you get leukemia, immature cells are released into the bloodstream, and usually the number of white cells increases (though this increase might take almost 2 weeks). Red blood cells look kind of like donuts (without the hole), and are slightly smaller than the white cells, each of which has a nucleus. Immature red cells look similar to white cells (i.e.. slightly larger and have a nucleus). If you have more than about 1 white cell (including immature ones) to 400 red cells then start to worry. But, depending upon your plans for the eventual use of the bomb, a short life expectancy might not be a problem.
Step 2: Assembling the A-Bomb
Now that you've acquired the enriched uranium, all that's left is to assemble your A-bomb. Go find a couple of stainless steel salad bowls. You also want to separate your 10 pounds of U-235 into two hunks. (Keep them apart!) The idea is to push each half your uranium into the inside of a bowl.
Take one hunk of your uranium and beat it into the inside of the first bowl. Uranium is malleable, like gold, so you should have no trouble hammering it into the bowl to get a good fit. Take another five-pound hunk of uranium and fit it into a second stainless steel bowl. These two bowls of U-235 are the "subcritical masses" which, when brought together forcefully, will provide the critical mass that makes your A-bomb go. Keep them a respectful distance apart while working because you don't want them to "go critical" on you... At least not yet.
Now hollow out the body of an old canister-type vacuum cleaner and place your two hemispherical bowls inside, open ends facing each other, no less than seven inches apart, using masking tape to set them up in position. The reason for the steel bowls and the vacuum cleaner, in case you're wondering, is that these help reflect the neutrons back into the uranium for a more efficient explosion. "A loose neutron is a useless neutron" as the A-bomb pioneers used to say.
As far as the A-bomb goes, you're almost done. The final problem is to figure out how to get the two U-235 hemispheres to smash into each other with sufficient force to set off a truly effective fission reaction. Almost any type of explosive can be used to drive them together. Gunpowder, for example, is easily made at home from potassium nitrate, sulfur, and carbon. Or, you can get some blasting caps or TNT. (Buy them or steal them from a construction site.) Best of all is C4 plastic explosive. You can mold it around your bowls, and it's fairly safe to work with. (But, it might be wise to shape it around an extra salad bowl in another room, and THEN fit it to your uranium-packed bowls. This is particularly true in winter, when a stray static electrical charge might induce ignition in the C4. A responsible bomb maker considers it impolite to accidentally destroy more of the neighborhood than absolutely necessary.)
Once the explosives are in place all you need to do is hook up a simple detonation device with a few batteries, a switch, and some wire. Remember though that it is essential that the two charges -- one on each side of the casing -- go off simultaneously.
Now put the whole thing in the casing of an old Hoover vacuum cleaner and you're finished with this part of the process.
The rest is easy.
Step 3: Make More A-Bombs Following the Directions Above
You'll need a total of at least four.
A Word to the Wise About Wastes
After your A-bomb is completed you'll have a pile of moderately fatal radioactive wastes like U-238. These are not dangerous, but you do have to get rid of them. You can flush leftovers down the toilet. (Don't worry about polluting the ocean, there is already so much radioactive waste there, a few more bucketfuls won't make any waves whatsoever.) If you're the fastidious type -- the kind who never leaves gum under their seat at the movies -- you can seal the nasty stuff in coffee cans and bury it in the backyard, just like Uncle Sam does. If the neighbor kids have a habit of trampling the lawn, tell them to play over by the waste. You'll soon find that they're spending most of their time in bed.
Going First Class
If you're like us, you're feeling the economic pinch, and you'll want to make your bomb as inexpensively as possible, consonant of course with reasonable yield. The recipe we've given is for a budget-pleasing H-bomb, no frills, no flourishes; it's just a simple 5-megaton bomb, capable of wiping out the New York metropolitan area, the San Francisco Bay area, or Boston. But don't forget, your H-bomb will only be as good as the A-bombs in it.
If you want to spend a little more money you can punch-up your A-bomb considerably. Instead of centrifuging your uranium by hand, you can buy a commercial centrifuge. (Fisher Scientific sells one for about $1000.) You also might want to be fussier about your design. The Hiroshima bomb, a relatively crude one, only fissioned 1 percent of it's uranium and yielded only 13 kilotons. In order to fission more of the uranium, the force of your explosive "trigger" needs to be evenly diffused around the sphere; the same pressure has to be exerted on every point of the sphere simultaneously. (It was a technique for producing this sort of simultaneous detonation by fashioning the explosives into lenses that the government accused Julius and Ethel Rosenberg of trying to steal).
Part 2: Putting Your H-Bomb Together
The heart of the H-bomb is the fusion process. Several A-bombs are detonated in such a way as to create the extremely high temperature (100 million degrees C) necessary to fuse lithium deuteride (LiD) into helium. When the lithium nucleus slams into the deuterium nucleus, two helium nuclei are created, and if this happens to enough deuterium nuclei rapidly enough, the result is an enormous amount of energy: the energy of the H-bomb. You don't have to worry about stealing lithium deuteride, it can be purchased from any chemical-supply house. It costs $1000 a pound. If your budget won't allow it you can substitute lithium hydride at $40 a pound. You will need at least 100 pounds. It's a corrosive and toxic powder so be careful.
Place the lithium deuteride or hydride in glass jars and surround it with four A-bombs in their casings. Attach them to the same detonator so that they will go off simultaneously. The container for the whole thing is no problem. They can be placed anywhere: Inside an old stereo console, a discarded refrigerator, etc...
When the detonator sets off the four A-bombs all eight hemispheres of fissionable material will slam into each other at the same time creating four critical masses and four detonations. This will raise the temperature of the lithium deuteride to 100 million degrees C fast enough (a few billionths of a second) so that the lithium will not be blown all over the neighborhood before the nuclei have time to fuse. The result, at least 1000 times the punch of the puny A-bomb that leveled Hiroshima (20 million tons of TNT vs. 20 thousand tons.)
Part 3: What to do With Your Bomb
Now that you have a fully assembled H-bomb housed in an attractive console of your choice you may be wondering, "What should I do with it?" Every family will have to answer this question according to its own tastes and preferences, but you may want to explore some possibilities which have been successfully pioneered by the American government.
1. Sell Your Bomb and Make a Pile of Money
In these days of rising inflation, increasing unemployment, and an uncertain economic outlook, few businesses make as much sense as weapons production. If your career forecast is cloudy, bomb sales may be the only sure way to avoid the humiliation of receiving welfare, or unemployment. Regardless of your present income level, a home H-bomb business can be an invaluable income supplement, and certainly a profitable alternative to selling Tupperware or pirated Girl Scout cookies.
Unfortunately for the family bomb business, big government has already cornered a large part of the world market. But this does not mean that there is a shortage of potential customers. The raid on Entebee was the Waterloo of hijacking, and many nationalist groups are now on the alert for new means to get their message across. They'd jump at the chance to get hold of an H-bomb. Emerging nations which can't ante up enough rice or sugar to buy themselves a reactor from G.E. or Westinghouse are also shopping around.
You may wonder about the ethics of selling to nations, or groups, whose goals you may disapprove of. But here again, take a tip from our government: forget ideology -- it's cash that counts. And remember, H-bomb sales have a way of escalating, almost like a chain reaction. Suppose you make a sale to South Yemen which you believe to be a Soviet puppet. Well within a few days some discrete inquiries from North Yemen and possibly the Saudis, the Egyptians and the Ethiopians as well can be expected. Similarly, a sale to the IRA will generate a sale to the Ulster government; and a sale to the Tanzanians will bring the Ugandans running, and so forth.
It doesn't matter WHICH side you're on, only how many sides there are. Don't forget about the possibility of repeat sales to the same customer. As the experience of both the U.S. and the U.S.S.R. has shown, each individual nation has a potentially infinite need for H-bombs. No customer -- no matter how small -- can ever have too many.
2. Use Your Bomb at Home
Many families are attracted to the H-bomb simply as a "deterrent." A discrete sticker on the door or on the living room window saying "This Home Protected by H-bomb" will discourage IRS investigators, census takers, and Jehovah's Witnesses. You'll be surprised how fast the crime rate will go down and property values will go up. And once the news gets out that you are a home H-bomb owner you'll find that you have unexpected leverage in neighborhood disputes over everything from parking places and stereo noise levels to school tax rates. So relax and enjoy the pride and excitement of home H-bomb ownership!
Is It For You?
Let's be honest. The H-bomb isn't for everyone. Frankly there are people who can't handle it. They break out in hives at the very mention of mega-death, fallout, or radiation sickness.
The following quiz will help you find out whether you have what it takes for home H-bomb ownership. If you can answer "yes" to six or more of these questions, then you're emotionally eligible to join the nuclear club. If not, a more conventional weapon may be more your cup of tea, try botulism-toxin, laser rays, or nerve gas.
1. I ignore the demands of others.
2. I subscribe to one or more of the following: Soldier of Fortune, Hustler, Popular Mechanics, Self.
3. Though I have many interesting acquaintances, I am my own best friend.
4. I know what to say after you say "Hello," but I am seldom interested in pursuing the conversation.
5. I have seen the movie "The Deer Hunter" more than once.
6. I know that everyone can be a winner if they want to, and I resent whiners.
7. I own one or more of the following: handgun, video game, trash compactor, snowmobile.
8. I am convinced that leukemia is psychosomatic.
9. I am aware that most vegetarians are sexually impotent.
10. I have read evidence that solar energy is a Communist conspiracy.
Myths About Nuclear War
Ever since the first mushroom cloud over Hiroshima ushered in the atomic age, a small group of nay-sayers and doom-mongers has lobbied, campaigned and demonstrated to convince Americans that H-bomb ownership, along with nuclear power, is dangerous and unhealthy. Using their virtual stranglehold over the media, these people have tried to discredit everything nuclear from energy to war. They have vastly overrated the risks of nuclear bombs and left many Americans feeling demoralized and indecisive; not sure where the truth lies. Well, here are the myths, and here are the facts.
Myth: After a nuclear exchange the earth will no longer be suitable for human habitation.
Fact: This is completely false. According to one scientist (quoted in John McPee's The Curve of Binding Energy) "The largest bomb that has ever been exploded anywhere was 60 megatons, and that is one-thousandth the force of an earthquake, one-thousandth the force of a hurricane. We have lived with earthquakes and hurricanes for a long time." Another scientist adds, "It is often assumed that a full blown nuclear war would be the end of life on earth. That is far from the truth. To end life on earth would take at least a thousand times the total yield of all the nuclear explosives existing in the world, and probably a lot more." Even if humans succumbed, many forms of life would survive a nuclear free-for-all, cockroaches, certain forms of bacteria, and lichens, for instance.
Myth: Radiation is bad for you.
Fact: Everything is bad for you if you have too much of it. If you eat too many bananas you'll get a stomach-ache. If you get too much sun you can get sunburned (or even skin cancer). Same thing with radiation. Too much may make you feel under the weather, but nuclear industry officials insist that there is no evidence that low-level radiation has any really serious adverse effects. And, high-level radiation may bring unexpected benefits. It speeds up evolution by weeding out unwanted genetic types and creating new ones. (Remember the old saying, "Two heads are better than one.") Nearer to home, it's plain that radiation will get rid of pesky crab grass and weeds, and teenagers will find that brief exposure to a nuclear burst vaporizes acne and other skin blemishes. (Many survivors of the Hiroshima bomb found that they were free from skin and its attendant problems forever.)
We hope this clears up any misconceptions you may have had. Enjoy your H-Bomb!
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
~* through the key hole...me *~
In a daze .... pulsing ... abrasive.. edging through scratching the ends... the cuts ...deepen... blood drips down the skin .... How could i raise my head against the flow.. it is pushing me below the surface ... i choke.... the hatred swells up.. blood pumps up.... i feel it pulsing through my viens.... lifting my eyes.... whatever i see ... why ? ... my arms feeling numb... i raise them .. cover my face... the coldness that grips me from within ... how will i get over it... where is humanity.. it cuts through flesh ..skin... cushioning my fall ... slow..... then i rise... the strength flows back ... feeling it ... rushing up ... i scream with it.... and it takes over..... all the power transformed... form .. it is hurting.. the ache in my head is growing .. my heart.. who knows....
As I walk ... walk through the mist... dew drops forming on my stubble... yet fingers finding the warmth from her fingers... the moonlight shines through the clouds .. through the mist .. lighting up her face.. ah.. so beautiful .. i want to keep looking at her.. she smiles... i tighten my fingers around hers... the wind flutters her clothes about her fragile body .. i want to take her in my arms.. hold her .. never to let go .. a tear forms in my eye.. not from sadness.. but who knows why... it fills my eye ... rolls down.. she turns to me... looking into my eyes...her face shows it all.. so clear ... i could see to her depths.. i could see myself there...her hair flows over her face... her delicate hand brushes it off her face... I knew she was happy... happy to be with me.. cos she knew she made me the happiest man on earth.... I love her forever... she is my girl ... and she is happy for that.. I love my girl ...
As I walk ... walk through the mist... dew drops forming on my stubble... yet fingers finding the warmth from her fingers... the moonlight shines through the clouds .. through the mist .. lighting up her face.. ah.. so beautiful .. i want to keep looking at her.. she smiles... i tighten my fingers around hers... the wind flutters her clothes about her fragile body .. i want to take her in my arms.. hold her .. never to let go .. a tear forms in my eye.. not from sadness.. but who knows why... it fills my eye ... rolls down.. she turns to me... looking into my eyes...her face shows it all.. so clear ... i could see to her depths.. i could see myself there...her hair flows over her face... her delicate hand brushes it off her face... I knew she was happy... happy to be with me.. cos she knew she made me the happiest man on earth.... I love her forever... she is my girl ... and she is happy for that.. I love my girl ...
Monday, July 18, 2005
D : The Story Of A Director >Amatuer~
7 o' clock . That was a time unheard of. But they woke up early for the D day . JB woke up early that day , so did bleak , shank and AJ . They began to trickle into JB's shack from fifteen minutes past 7 . Bleak reached there by 7:30 . They tried to tape a soundtrack onto an olympus microrecorder . But that having failed they tried with a regular tape and recorder , and that suceeded . Now everything was ready , the guitar , the keyboard , the backup power , the Sony Handycam , all the right wires , the screenplay board . Everything was loaded into Bleak's M800 , and AJ and JB clambered on top of AJ's Hyosung GF170 . The journey had begun , with Bleak at the wheel of the M800 . They first stopped at JJ's house and picked him up in his "cochin hanifa" costume . Well that would have to suffice they summarised and got on way . Bleak being new to the arena of 4 wheeled vehicles , was a bit slow which suited everyone fine since the destination was high range , Ponmudi .
Most of the drive up the hills was uneventful , except for tons of goals self inflicted by Shank , mildly hurting his pride . Then suddenly they ran into a ceiling , a ceiling of fog or clouds . They could'nt see even 5 metres in front of them . But they carried on , and on the first scenic location jumped out of the car and setup for a shot . JB's was the first , with bleak behind the lens . JB poured out his heart in front of the camera and then JJ joined in with something resembling the wail of a mortally injured donkey . AJ rocked with the slash act , staging it , faking it perfectly . They had got their shot and it was a wrap . Next up , making their way slowly and steadily up the hill they proceeded onto top station . There the mist intensified , and the bearing to the hill or the risky path leading to the top was hidden . Suddenly to top it all off came the rain . The cold cut them like daggers , tearing at their skins , the winds threatening to blow them off the mountain . Finally when they reached the top of the mountain , the fog was so thick that much of the shots taken were threatening to go wasted because of the lens fogging up .
With Ponmudi in the bag , the team started on way to Kallar . There they descended down the steps to gushing waters , with force enough to wash away anyone in their path . The team threaded among the slippery rocks in knee deep gushing mountain stream , bone chillingly cold , waters , sometimes needing a lot of persuation from the director to make it across a slightly riskier stretch of water . Finally the shot was done . A few shots of JB's vocals were also taken . Kallar was a wrap too . The team now moved to Aruvikkara , where a few shots were filmed between rock walls . So finally the day was over . And there was almost half an hour of video . Everyone was happy . They all went home happy .
Now poor director needs to turn editor and learn Premier to edit out the video into a 5 minute rock video .
Most of the drive up the hills was uneventful , except for tons of goals self inflicted by Shank , mildly hurting his pride . Then suddenly they ran into a ceiling , a ceiling of fog or clouds . They could'nt see even 5 metres in front of them . But they carried on , and on the first scenic location jumped out of the car and setup for a shot . JB's was the first , with bleak behind the lens . JB poured out his heart in front of the camera and then JJ joined in with something resembling the wail of a mortally injured donkey . AJ rocked with the slash act , staging it , faking it perfectly . They had got their shot and it was a wrap . Next up , making their way slowly and steadily up the hill they proceeded onto top station . There the mist intensified , and the bearing to the hill or the risky path leading to the top was hidden . Suddenly to top it all off came the rain . The cold cut them like daggers , tearing at their skins , the winds threatening to blow them off the mountain . Finally when they reached the top of the mountain , the fog was so thick that much of the shots taken were threatening to go wasted because of the lens fogging up .
With Ponmudi in the bag , the team started on way to Kallar . There they descended down the steps to gushing waters , with force enough to wash away anyone in their path . The team threaded among the slippery rocks in knee deep gushing mountain stream , bone chillingly cold , waters , sometimes needing a lot of persuation from the director to make it across a slightly riskier stretch of water . Finally the shot was done . A few shots of JB's vocals were also taken . Kallar was a wrap too . The team now moved to Aruvikkara , where a few shots were filmed between rock walls . So finally the day was over . And there was almost half an hour of video . Everyone was happy . They all went home happy .
Now poor director needs to turn editor and learn Premier to edit out the video into a 5 minute rock video .
Thursday, July 14, 2005
Shoot To Kill
Well its been almost three years in the works now . Actually it started years back , within the person himself , within the budding artist . My friend Jonathan Bruce is the person under question and his quest to make music , and that too a pretty good specimen of it , has been a continually devoloping story in itself . In the beginning it was amatuerish , but still fresh and catchy . Basically snappy tunes , hoards of explicit lyrics and a lot of fun : that would be how I would classify the first tunes , which included the funny 'Karuthamma' , and such other atrocities against common taste ( they were actually quite good !!) . Then started the age of favorites , with each new song being written quicky catching on in the circle and becoming favorites fast . Personally my favorite is a song called 'Wanna get down' , with its own hip-hop and rock versions both equally good . But what caught everyones fancy was another funny song 'Mood' ( the title being in malayalam ..LOL) . So that was going on great with everyone who listened to it going home humming the tune . But then suddenly everything changed . Thats where another great song , 'Swachamaya' made its debut . It was a crowd favorite , allegedly bringing tears to Ajmals's eyes the first time he was subjected to a vocal reproduction of the touching but somewhat simply prosed lyrics . Anyway , the execution was in a class of its own , with no current malayalam song coming anywhere close to it in its setting . Well , one would think that was the end of it , but no , thats when the artist's fancy brought to life another funny song to strike ' Mood ' off the popular charts . That was the witty and extremely catchy ' Da aval po'onnu' . The lyrics would probably send everyone tearing their hair out on listening to it for the first time , but still send them back to it out of sheer curiosity . The offbeat and simple lyrics would send anyone into peals of laughter . And here too the execution is perfect , and its obvious too .
There are other great songs too , thus sending the total count of good songs to about 10 . And each is unique , with a classical song 'Shruthiyay' . Well , now its upto producer Phillippose Kurian to decide which one is going to be made into a full budgeted music video . I strongly suggested 'da aval po'onu' . Well we have started shooting "Thalarathe" video with an amatuerish Sony Handycam and an amatuerish , poor old , me as the camera man . God what all do I want to do in this world :) .~~~
There are other great songs too , thus sending the total count of good songs to about 10 . And each is unique , with a classical song 'Shruthiyay' . Well , now its upto producer Phillippose Kurian to decide which one is going to be made into a full budgeted music video . I strongly suggested 'da aval po'onu' . Well we have started shooting "Thalarathe" video with an amatuerish Sony Handycam and an amatuerish , poor old , me as the camera man . God what all do I want to do in this world :) .~~~
Saturday, July 09, 2005
Gods Own Country
Well , since I have been out of the blogging scene for a while now , its high time I redeemed my presence in the cyber world . Many things have happened in the little while I was away . Maybe one event worth mentioning would be my ascension to the higher rungs of the gaming world with the purchase of a Gefore 5200 fx Agp card and an overclockable ASUS p4ge-mx to boot .
Well I can understand a lot of readers' faces going suddenly into grimaces with the usage of computer digits . Jargon it indeed is , a lot of it to me too . So what do I write about this time .
Well yesterday I was at the traffic stop at pattom and beside me was parked an autorickshaw full of some southeast asian tourists . What was amusing both me and the tourists was the auto driver's continous blabber in 'manglish' about tourists and his apparent grasp of current affairs . Well I could not understand what he was trying to convey to the confused yet amused tourists , but I think I heard a few words being exchanged about Daewoo motors and its managing director being fired of something . But anyway the tourists had no idea about what he was talking about , and neither did I . And he went on to elaborate to the them that he knew all this from newspapers and the news . Well the point being , the common people of our state would be the most well read and the most up to date in the current affairs of the world .
Politics , terrorists , business , whatever be the topic kerala commonners seem to know it all . Well that oughta be ironical to someone . With majority of americans reading only the sports page and highest viewership for maybe hbo and espn , in the "Centre of the One World" , the Usa and here the local ammavans memorising the precise words that come out of Kofi Annan's mouth . It is infact not surprising of keralites . How can we expect less from the people who have one of the most versatile and modern languages in the world . We have one of the most varied , colourful and amazing arts . Maybe other cultures could boast of , maybe two arts which are truly amazing . But kerala is different : kadhakali, kalaripayattu , ottamthullal , and a lot of other things i have never even heard about earlier . Well maybe we are a special breed . Who knows who's gonna be here in 5 years among those who might read this . Think about what you are leaving behind . Think about what would remain when you come back to this world . Make your memories now , treasure them ....
Well I can understand a lot of readers' faces going suddenly into grimaces with the usage of computer digits . Jargon it indeed is , a lot of it to me too . So what do I write about this time .
Well yesterday I was at the traffic stop at pattom and beside me was parked an autorickshaw full of some southeast asian tourists . What was amusing both me and the tourists was the auto driver's continous blabber in 'manglish' about tourists and his apparent grasp of current affairs . Well I could not understand what he was trying to convey to the confused yet amused tourists , but I think I heard a few words being exchanged about Daewoo motors and its managing director being fired of something . But anyway the tourists had no idea about what he was talking about , and neither did I . And he went on to elaborate to the them that he knew all this from newspapers and the news . Well the point being , the common people of our state would be the most well read and the most up to date in the current affairs of the world .
Politics , terrorists , business , whatever be the topic kerala commonners seem to know it all . Well that oughta be ironical to someone . With majority of americans reading only the sports page and highest viewership for maybe hbo and espn , in the "Centre of the One World" , the Usa and here the local ammavans memorising the precise words that come out of Kofi Annan's mouth . It is infact not surprising of keralites . How can we expect less from the people who have one of the most versatile and modern languages in the world . We have one of the most varied , colourful and amazing arts . Maybe other cultures could boast of , maybe two arts which are truly amazing . But kerala is different : kadhakali, kalaripayattu , ottamthullal , and a lot of other things i have never even heard about earlier . Well maybe we are a special breed . Who knows who's gonna be here in 5 years among those who might read this . Think about what you are leaving behind . Think about what would remain when you come back to this world . Make your memories now , treasure them ....
Sunday, June 19, 2005
oN Campus
When I reached college that day at 10 i could see that a lot of people had turned up , so many cars , so many bikes . But the college was empty , with not even a soul to be seen around . But i knew they were there , battling with math and logic problems , wrestling to get the vocab and comprehension under control . Then finally they slowly began to disperse , and the wait for the short list began . The mood was one of mild tension , but since it was only the first company , i'd have to say the mood was positive all around . And it helped that almost everyone who appeared for the test was shortlisted .
Now began the preparation for the interview . Nithu was tensed and asked for my help , which i ofcourse gave away without much prompting ( ofcourse to any girl ) . It was fun reading the HR forms completed by most of them . Anitha had written that her hobby was to take care of the fish in her fish tank . Well then I began to help rajani write the longest sentence of her life.. which naturally no one could comprehend.
Then at 9 , everyone clambered into the CGPU hall and they dropped the bombshell ... 197 placed...And they began reading out the names of each .. the list had very few surprises , with everyone who would be expected to be place amond the first lot were picked . Mag got , minu got , aish got , the family - punjabi, nami and bugz got .. I was happy ... But i could see a lot of disappointed faces...
Better luck next time guys..
I hope i can atleast appear for one of them...
Now began the preparation for the interview . Nithu was tensed and asked for my help , which i ofcourse gave away without much prompting ( ofcourse to any girl ) . It was fun reading the HR forms completed by most of them . Anitha had written that her hobby was to take care of the fish in her fish tank . Well then I began to help rajani write the longest sentence of her life.. which naturally no one could comprehend.
Then at 9 , everyone clambered into the CGPU hall and they dropped the bombshell ... 197 placed...And they began reading out the names of each .. the list had very few surprises , with everyone who would be expected to be place amond the first lot were picked . Mag got , minu got , aish got , the family - punjabi, nami and bugz got .. I was happy ... But i could see a lot of disappointed faces...
Better luck next time guys..
I hope i can atleast appear for one of them...
Monday, June 13, 2005
Why Do We Do ?
Relationships . They are always hard to maintain . My strong belief is that for a relationship to work , atleast one of the parties involved has to make serious effort at holding it together . Thus is the nature of people that they do a lot of things , harmfull to the relationship , hurting , with or without knowing . Sometimes they do things , which they might have recognised as hurting if their heads were clear from everything else . Logic and clarity of minds are things which elude a lot of us , and even when that star does shine upon us , it does with varying intensities and very little dependability . So we end up doing things you know is going to hurt your friends , but that call for check from within is muffled and faint , coming from deep inside , from underneath the heap of emotions clogging the immediate proximity of the conscious mind . So why do we do those things , we might never find out . Some even do not realise they are doing things , which might have even put themselves to shame , if someone was good enough to them to point their mistakes out to them , even at their own cost . But very few of us have got friends of that depth and sincerity . Atleast I am glad I am a one among the lucky . Mag you are the best friend I have got in college . I am so glad i have you to look over me and chaperone my morality (please excuse the usage!!)
Friday, June 10, 2005
Inside Out
Well , how well do each of us think we know each other . We might make the common mistake of thinking that we know quite a lot about ourselves . We think we have ourselves figured out , after hours and hours of contemplation and self exploration , which has finally led us onto the misconclusion that we are basically all geniuses .
Then comes the difficult task of putting all that you know you are onto a two sheet pinned form of a curricum vitae or resume . You sit down in front of your PC or a piece of blank paper and start writing . Sure , name , address , phone number . You have got no problems there they are , perfectly written , in the precise format , aligned well to one side , looking all neat and tidy . So , now that the beginning came out so good , you tend to think that the rest would turn out to be a piece of cake . So Academics . Then it strikes you , how bad a measly 62 odd aggregagte marks looks on paper . Well what can you say , its college and you still could make the cut offs for the campuses . 10th and 12th were fine with marks in the mid 70's .
Well now you stop for a second and think . All that has been written are mandatory , and the interviewer would not even glance at it once . So now you have to write about something that will catch the attention of the interviewers and would turn out to my advantage . Lets blow them away with my variegated arsenal of proffessional software suites . Photosphop . Yeah , i have used it , but its like saying you have used Anakin Skywalker's Light sabre to open a bag of chips . But maybe i could even then impress them if they caught onto it . Operating Systems are fine too , since i have atleast once tried my hand at all windows versions and a couple of linux ones . Skills are a mess . What ever you are gonna write , they are going to kill you for it . So make your own life sentence as light as possible . Finally comes a section to give your interests and achievements , and thats when you realised you have never done anything in your life . And how can you write your main interest is in girls . lol . Well think hard on it ... me still am...
~when you are living lost lives , all this ceases to matter `
Then comes the difficult task of putting all that you know you are onto a two sheet pinned form of a curricum vitae or resume . You sit down in front of your PC or a piece of blank paper and start writing . Sure , name , address , phone number . You have got no problems there they are , perfectly written , in the precise format , aligned well to one side , looking all neat and tidy . So , now that the beginning came out so good , you tend to think that the rest would turn out to be a piece of cake . So Academics . Then it strikes you , how bad a measly 62 odd aggregagte marks looks on paper . Well what can you say , its college and you still could make the cut offs for the campuses . 10th and 12th were fine with marks in the mid 70's .
Well now you stop for a second and think . All that has been written are mandatory , and the interviewer would not even glance at it once . So now you have to write about something that will catch the attention of the interviewers and would turn out to my advantage . Lets blow them away with my variegated arsenal of proffessional software suites . Photosphop . Yeah , i have used it , but its like saying you have used Anakin Skywalker's Light sabre to open a bag of chips . But maybe i could even then impress them if they caught onto it . Operating Systems are fine too , since i have atleast once tried my hand at all windows versions and a couple of linux ones . Skills are a mess . What ever you are gonna write , they are going to kill you for it . So make your own life sentence as light as possible . Finally comes a section to give your interests and achievements , and thats when you realised you have never done anything in your life . And how can you write your main interest is in girls . lol . Well think hard on it ... me still am...
~when you are living lost lives , all this ceases to matter `
Monday, June 06, 2005
Lost Lives~
"So . Talk"
"Well , what are your career choices ? "
"Software field ofcourse , then maybe M tech and ofcourse I could just get married . I'm going to get my dad to marry me off to a gulf dude . Then I can work there . "
Well Rahi , best of luck for your plans to teach , get married and have a lot of great kids . Focus shifts now back to my career , for the first time after coming to college . What..? With everyone running about , buying books , attending talks , solving puzzles 24/7 , buying a tie then finding out they don't know to tie it and then running about trying to find someone who does . Well that reminds me that I have to learn to knot a tie and that too well .... ( Are ties costly?? )
So what is everyone so worried about suddenly amidst the fun and frolic of the leisurely paced college life? What could be so demanding as to break this spell ?
Well its season again for a little game of campus recruiting , and ofcourse , the guys are quite right to be worried . And to tell the truth , I am a little worried too . Well its mostly clearing up ( I think) . I have been asking everyone their opinions on the matter , whether to try stick to the civil field or go along with the flow into the IT field . Maybe I'm meant to go into the IT field . But its still troubling me , whether would this make me happy ? Would I be able to get the life I want ? I have confided in some of you about my vague and superficial dreams . So you may think its not worth taking that big a risk for . Who knows . Where do each of you see yourself 10 years from now . But you have probably already prepared some answer to that ( be a satified human being , be a fore runner in the company you are working for and ofcourse make tons of money) . But what if it were 20 years and you were told to take a minute and really think it out without the cliches ? Think of how you will look back at your life at the half way point in your life . Would you have done the 'something' you had always wanted to do . Were you as happy as you expected you to be when you were 20 (now , and btw figure that out now ) . Well its your life and its just beginning , and many things are yet to be figured out properly . Think hard and clear about it .. And ofcourse more importantly THINK ON YOUR OWN ABOUT IT . Lifes lost... and you lost with it...
"Well , what are your career choices ? "
"Software field ofcourse , then maybe M tech and ofcourse I could just get married . I'm going to get my dad to marry me off to a gulf dude . Then I can work there . "
Well Rahi , best of luck for your plans to teach , get married and have a lot of great kids . Focus shifts now back to my career , for the first time after coming to college . What..? With everyone running about , buying books , attending talks , solving puzzles 24/7 , buying a tie then finding out they don't know to tie it and then running about trying to find someone who does . Well that reminds me that I have to learn to knot a tie and that too well .... ( Are ties costly?? )
So what is everyone so worried about suddenly amidst the fun and frolic of the leisurely paced college life? What could be so demanding as to break this spell ?
Well its season again for a little game of campus recruiting , and ofcourse , the guys are quite right to be worried . And to tell the truth , I am a little worried too . Well its mostly clearing up ( I think) . I have been asking everyone their opinions on the matter , whether to try stick to the civil field or go along with the flow into the IT field . Maybe I'm meant to go into the IT field . But its still troubling me , whether would this make me happy ? Would I be able to get the life I want ? I have confided in some of you about my vague and superficial dreams . So you may think its not worth taking that big a risk for . Who knows . Where do each of you see yourself 10 years from now . But you have probably already prepared some answer to that ( be a satified human being , be a fore runner in the company you are working for and ofcourse make tons of money) . But what if it were 20 years and you were told to take a minute and really think it out without the cliches ? Think of how you will look back at your life at the half way point in your life . Would you have done the 'something' you had always wanted to do . Were you as happy as you expected you to be when you were 20 (now , and btw figure that out now ) . Well its your life and its just beginning , and many things are yet to be figured out properly . Think hard and clear about it .. And ofcourse more importantly THINK ON YOUR OWN ABOUT IT . Lifes lost... and you lost with it...
Thursday, May 26, 2005
sCCratccHinGg mAaaa NeRrvesSss
Today after quite some time , I was feeling down , I mean really down . Well as nostalgic as it may have been , it brought to my attention certain things that are missing from life . Definitely i miss System Of a Down . There is no measure as to how it would have helped me when I was desp today . Instead I had to subject myself to the torture of a playlist created by my brother . How i wish i had the oteps or slipknots or hatebreeds . Slayer , to which i never devoloped a taste since it came recently in time where the kind of music under discussion now havent been required for a long time . But if i could get my hands on a geniune slayer i would definitely make it a part of my retinue .
Now since the heavy stuff is missing from my normally stocked arsenal , i had to dig pretty hard . But digging deep enough i found stuff which would do pretty well . Disturbed , another one of those to which i never devoloped a taste came to the rescue . Now i can understand Jonathans fanatic adhesion to the song Down with the sickness . Faithful as ever metallica never let me down ever , nor did it today . Fuel pumped me up enough , followed by godsmack . The heavy noise pollution could not afford to give way for nirvana even though that too could have sufficed for my vent of anger or what ever . But it wouldnt have compared to the current pot full of emotions in me . But very ape found its way into the playlist . The very very very very powerful and gnawing guitars touched the right knots which the rape me would have definitely missed . There used to be a time when i could blast off in my room , unconcerned about the neighbours , but that aint now . Maybe after the shift . I need more sound anyway . This stuff aint powerfull enough even tough extremely loud . Du hast was a mismatch .... it was a happy song..... so had to cut it off the list and fill it up with without a choice rape me.. maybe i oughta run to jonathan house to listen to something there ....
Me out ... Peace to all ya motherfuckers...
Now since the heavy stuff is missing from my normally stocked arsenal , i had to dig pretty hard . But digging deep enough i found stuff which would do pretty well . Disturbed , another one of those to which i never devoloped a taste came to the rescue . Now i can understand Jonathans fanatic adhesion to the song Down with the sickness . Faithful as ever metallica never let me down ever , nor did it today . Fuel pumped me up enough , followed by godsmack . The heavy noise pollution could not afford to give way for nirvana even though that too could have sufficed for my vent of anger or what ever . But it wouldnt have compared to the current pot full of emotions in me . But very ape found its way into the playlist . The very very very very powerful and gnawing guitars touched the right knots which the rape me would have definitely missed . There used to be a time when i could blast off in my room , unconcerned about the neighbours , but that aint now . Maybe after the shift . I need more sound anyway . This stuff aint powerfull enough even tough extremely loud . Du hast was a mismatch .... it was a happy song..... so had to cut it off the list and fill it up with without a choice rape me.. maybe i oughta run to jonathan house to listen to something there ....
Me out ... Peace to all ya motherfuckers...
Thursday, May 19, 2005
The Eminem Show
So I've been posting long in here , but I have never expressed my tastes , in music , in movies or infact anything other than biking and my obsessive interest in girls . So this is a blog for me ..
So today I was watching a show about Eminem and how he made it big in the Hip Hop scene , which is usually monopolised by the afro-americans . They despise the white folk of america and direct most of the lyrics explicit and all at their white faced , supposed oppressors . So back to eminem . Although he came into my attention in 2000 with his record smashing "real slim shady" , he was pretty famous a year before (but news gets here slow) . So enter a bad ass white guy , rapping around , bad mouthing everything and everyone , making fun of everything and everyone . This was followed by many of his similar antics and the really touching songs among them became jus flukes . Even though many of his earlier songs were , apart from their explicit lyrics , great music , it was rarely acknowledged that eminem could infact make good music . "Cleaning out my closet" was infact very touching , but here , among friends just seen as another eminem track .
The real turning point came with "Stan" and ofcourse my favorite "Lose yourself" . Stan , featuring dido , in one of his best , but that has infact a lot to do with dido and her superb song . But the genius in lose yourself cannot be denied . Not by listener , not by fans , and not by critics . Eminem was here . He was an apprentice (to Dr. Dre) no more . He was the biggest name in pop . R&B stars accepts him , Dre directs him and everyone has to respect him .
Toy soldiers hit it #1 at UK . But its not our style , with neither me nor Jonathan liking it . But "lose yourself " and "8 Mile " has enough steam to push him on for some time more......
So Let Me Get The Fuck Out ...
So today I was watching a show about Eminem and how he made it big in the Hip Hop scene , which is usually monopolised by the afro-americans . They despise the white folk of america and direct most of the lyrics explicit and all at their white faced , supposed oppressors . So back to eminem . Although he came into my attention in 2000 with his record smashing "real slim shady" , he was pretty famous a year before (but news gets here slow) . So enter a bad ass white guy , rapping around , bad mouthing everything and everyone , making fun of everything and everyone . This was followed by many of his similar antics and the really touching songs among them became jus flukes . Even though many of his earlier songs were , apart from their explicit lyrics , great music , it was rarely acknowledged that eminem could infact make good music . "Cleaning out my closet" was infact very touching , but here , among friends just seen as another eminem track .
The real turning point came with "Stan" and ofcourse my favorite "Lose yourself" . Stan , featuring dido , in one of his best , but that has infact a lot to do with dido and her superb song . But the genius in lose yourself cannot be denied . Not by listener , not by fans , and not by critics . Eminem was here . He was an apprentice (to Dr. Dre) no more . He was the biggest name in pop . R&B stars accepts him , Dre directs him and everyone has to respect him .
Toy soldiers hit it #1 at UK . But its not our style , with neither me nor Jonathan liking it . But "lose yourself " and "8 Mile " has enough steam to push him on for some time more......
So Let Me Get The Fuck Out ...
Sunday, May 15, 2005
The Microsoft Curse
Windows . Microsoft windows . This has become one of the biggest names in history . My life is intertwined with the manipulation of the various forms of windows and the hundreds of intricate settings inside it . Windows 98 and XP both have their positives and negatives as far as I am concerned . Windows 98 has become a necessity on my computer since it is plagued by bad sectors and strapped for RAM and video memory . Installing it is easy on the nerves for me , with the installation completed within 15 mins . The drivers and setups are all at easy reach in the D: drive , and that too finishes within 15 mins . So my OS for all diagnostic purposes is up and running . But running on 98 is like riding a Hero Honda CD100 . Somehow it lacks juice , although it can be kept in spic and spank condition , it gets to your nerves in the end . Response is great , with under 10 seconds bootup and 2 second shut downs . Disk Doctor and Surface Scans can be called into action through DOS and everything is fine . But you still feel weak and pre-archaic .
This is where XP comes in . Once you start runnig XP its hard to go back . Each time I abandon a slow XP and go back to 98 , I yearn to return back to the cosy XP base . It feels like a cushion under me . I cant explain it but I feel pampered and a deep fulfillment . But then comes the drawbacks . Since I dont trust my motherboard and that too with enough reason , its mandatory that I run my disk checks . But here is where XP lets me down . Even though it can be done at startups , it is too messy to be done correctly and frequently enough . And XP does tend drag on after a few months or so ( I have'nt had even a single install on any OS last for more than 2 months ) . But being online in XP is soothing . I can open any number of tabs and windows in Netscape or Opera or in Yahoo! or MSN and still expect it to run even after a few hangups . Nothing gets completely stuck on XP .
Linux is something beyond my grasp . So running linux is not an option even though I have redhat 8 and fedora CDs lying around .
So the new hard disk is on and running XP . Lets see how this goes .
This is where XP comes in . Once you start runnig XP its hard to go back . Each time I abandon a slow XP and go back to 98 , I yearn to return back to the cosy XP base . It feels like a cushion under me . I cant explain it but I feel pampered and a deep fulfillment . But then comes the drawbacks . Since I dont trust my motherboard and that too with enough reason , its mandatory that I run my disk checks . But here is where XP lets me down . Even though it can be done at startups , it is too messy to be done correctly and frequently enough . And XP does tend drag on after a few months or so ( I have'nt had even a single install on any OS last for more than 2 months ) . But being online in XP is soothing . I can open any number of tabs and windows in Netscape or Opera or in Yahoo! or MSN and still expect it to run even after a few hangups . Nothing gets completely stuck on XP .
Linux is something beyond my grasp . So running linux is not an option even though I have redhat 8 and fedora CDs lying around .
So the new hard disk is on and running XP . Lets see how this goes .
Exam Fever
Its exam time . Mag teached me stuff.. poor girl but do i heed .. lol .. nooooo...how can i with still 2 days to go to the exams... I tried explaining to her the working of my studying head.. she understands... but doesnt trust it.. hehe..
Anyway the preps are quite ok ... she taught me well .. thanks to her for that...
Thank you Mag...
Anyway the preps are quite ok ... she taught me well .. thanks to her for that...
Thank you Mag...
Saturday, May 07, 2005
Arya Reunion
School can be a strong influence on anyones life . It usually rubs off a lot onto the induvidual lending certain peculiar qualities , each school's different , on the students who spend the major part of the formative period of their young lives inside the walls of the institution , soaking in the principles and philosophies of the school . Almost certainly a mark of the school is stamped on the person for life , making him recognisable as the product of the particular school where ever life might take him .
As for me , I spent the last 9 years of my school life in Arya Central School , Pattom , making it undoubtedly the single most influential institution which has starred in my life , as of yet . Arya evokes different reactions in different ex-students ( or inmates ) . Some who have studied there for just a couple of years , look back on it with mild affection , while others who have spent 14 or so years there despise it so much that they would want nothing more than to be never reminded of those sad years spent at The Arya Central Jail . But what ever their opinion it is a fact that the school has changed them in some way or the other .
Anyway , yesterday was the first reunion of the 2002 passouts of Arya , held at Hotel Parkfield . Even though planned and executed within a short span of about just 2-3 days , the event was quite a success . Everyone was happy that they 'FINALLY' got to meet their school mates FOR THE FIRST TIME! Anyway there was loads of fun to be had . Everyone was falling head over heels for Anuja , turning the pretty kid into an instant celebrity . ChiChi like always managed to be the centre of a attraction , with her eyes still mersmerising every guy present , and making their hearts flutter with her smile and down turned eyes . I , like always was running around with a camera trying to capture the fun and frolic .
After the reunion we , the guys , decided to go to kovalam . So we started out to kovalam in two cars , racing and swearing all the way , Jidesh flooring it in Sajith's zen and Ashish following suit in my 800 . Once there , we shed our clothes and jumped into the welcoming sea , ofcourse in the close proximty of the most promising chick in the water . So an hour of the wind and waves , interspersed with glances towards the WET gals in the vicinity , left us all refreshed and pumped up . Then finally managing to pry ourselves from the water ( and our eyes from the very sexy gals in the water) we raced back to the city to get a hotel & eat our fills and start back home by 8 . But I still had to get my hands on the pics I had snapped from Manu the very same night . So started a frantic flight to three homes finally managing to download the pics onto a computer and writing it .
So we are all looking forward to the next reunion . Lets hope everyone shows up . This time 72 showed up , out of the 200 aryiites who passed out in 2002 . Next time let us hope for 200 .
As for me , I spent the last 9 years of my school life in Arya Central School , Pattom , making it undoubtedly the single most influential institution which has starred in my life , as of yet . Arya evokes different reactions in different ex-students ( or inmates ) . Some who have studied there for just a couple of years , look back on it with mild affection , while others who have spent 14 or so years there despise it so much that they would want nothing more than to be never reminded of those sad years spent at The Arya Central Jail . But what ever their opinion it is a fact that the school has changed them in some way or the other .
Anyway , yesterday was the first reunion of the 2002 passouts of Arya , held at Hotel Parkfield . Even though planned and executed within a short span of about just 2-3 days , the event was quite a success . Everyone was happy that they 'FINALLY' got to meet their school mates FOR THE FIRST TIME! Anyway there was loads of fun to be had . Everyone was falling head over heels for Anuja , turning the pretty kid into an instant celebrity . ChiChi like always managed to be the centre of a attraction , with her eyes still mersmerising every guy present , and making their hearts flutter with her smile and down turned eyes . I , like always was running around with a camera trying to capture the fun and frolic .
After the reunion we , the guys , decided to go to kovalam . So we started out to kovalam in two cars , racing and swearing all the way , Jidesh flooring it in Sajith's zen and Ashish following suit in my 800 . Once there , we shed our clothes and jumped into the welcoming sea , ofcourse in the close proximty of the most promising chick in the water . So an hour of the wind and waves , interspersed with glances towards the WET gals in the vicinity , left us all refreshed and pumped up . Then finally managing to pry ourselves from the water ( and our eyes from the very sexy gals in the water) we raced back to the city to get a hotel & eat our fills and start back home by 8 . But I still had to get my hands on the pics I had snapped from Manu the very same night . So started a frantic flight to three homes finally managing to download the pics onto a computer and writing it .
So we are all looking forward to the next reunion . Lets hope everyone shows up . This time 72 showed up , out of the 200 aryiites who passed out in 2002 . Next time let us hope for 200 .
Friday, April 22, 2005
Mess Of A Life
As each day melts into one another , I realise I have lost track of time . Its the twentieth day , or close to that , since I have been lost . Water is running out , even after the strict rationing I have been subjecting myself to . I knew water was the most precious of the commodities I could scavenge from the wreckage , limiting myself to a half cup each in the morning and evening . Its been difficult to keep a single direction , walking itself hard . The rough terrain making progress slow , but I know i have to keep moving west and there I have to cross the North-National highway . Even though it barely qualifies to be called a highway with its single lane tarmac surface almost eroded off , it would give me a chance of finding some strain of civilisation . But I could be way off in my estimation of my position , being hundreds of miles off from any sign of civilisation . I now curse each time I remember how foolishly i had started out . Mel was gone now , she could never return . Confusingly I feel very little emotion , conflicting the various thoughts that plague me during the unending hours of trekking . Sleep came easily the last few days , a welcome relief from the start . My muscles have toned themselves to the rigourous pace of the march , the aching has started to fade . I could not fully imagine how i looked . I was amusing myself thinking how my ex-wife and daughter would feel if they saw me now . What would little angeline think of her dad , if she saw me now , shirt in tatters , blood soaked khakis , not seen water in 20 days . I quickly drove away those distant thoughts and tried to concentrate on the present . My shoes would'nt hold out much longer , and the thought of losing my trusted boots frightened me . The terrain was rough and any of the sharp stone would shred my skin off my foot in a second . I had to find something to replace my boot . The evening closing in . I had to find a safe place to sleep away from the hyena and jackals . My eyelids aleady felt heavy , and it was risky to walk in the darkness . Collecting what ever twigs and logs I could find I made camp and dropped down to the hard ground and fell to sleep almost the instant i hit the ground . I knew no dreams would disturb this sleep . Deep .
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
neSt
All my life i've been shifting from one house to the other and to a certain extent one city to the next . So basically i've lived in five cities and about thirteen houses till now . So its understandable when i say i've never had any attachments to the houses i've stayed in . The current house , even though i've stayed in for about 3 years , is one to which i've had the least psychological attachment to . Infact i still havent seen most of the people who are supposed to be my neighbours , living about 5 meters or so away from my house . Atleast here , through common friends i've come to know some of the guys who live in the vicinity . So thats a fresh and welcome change .
Now back to the topic . So its odd that even though i've been in tvm for more that 10 year we havent bought a house here yet . So the oddity is set to end quite soon , surprising everyone from my mom to my brothers . Even though all the transactions are'nt over yet , the wheels have been set in motion and dad has finally signed the agreement and given the advance after a minor mishap which almost spelled the end of the deal before it started . Anyway the danger has passed and its now quite safe , although not completely safe , to start dreaming of a permanent house and maybe a neighbourhood where we atleast know who is living next door to us . But ofcourse the most important detail... there HAS to be chicks around... I wish god were kind to me and grant me that wish!!!
Now back to the topic . So its odd that even though i've been in tvm for more that 10 year we havent bought a house here yet . So the oddity is set to end quite soon , surprising everyone from my mom to my brothers . Even though all the transactions are'nt over yet , the wheels have been set in motion and dad has finally signed the agreement and given the advance after a minor mishap which almost spelled the end of the deal before it started . Anyway the danger has passed and its now quite safe , although not completely safe , to start dreaming of a permanent house and maybe a neighbourhood where we atleast know who is living next door to us . But ofcourse the most important detail... there HAS to be chicks around... I wish god were kind to me and grant me that wish!!!
Monday, April 11, 2005
ShAkEn uP...
The news of the drowning of a fellow CETian has left me shaken . More so because of my little trip to the high current waters of aruvikkara the same day and my insane mountain climbing there . But tragedy , it seems , struck somewhere close , but thankfully not that close . News of the ill-fated death has left everyone shaky . Aishu could'nt figure out what she felt , though it seemed like fear to me . My mother was morally shocked . "How difficult it would have been to raise a son so far , to see him lost , after reaching CET , and due to lack of water ???" . How cruelly ironic ? Why should he have drowned because of the lack of water ? That too in a Government run hostel . How would have the mates of the boy taken it . Helplessly watching bubbles come up , while all they can do is stand around helpless . How would it have affected them to see one among their brothers die ? God knows . God help us all . Peace . Time to correct all our mistakes . Do it right people . Life is too short to make silly mistakes .
Friday, April 08, 2005
The Circle Of Life
Why do you wanna go around in circles? We do tend to go around in circles with most of our problems . We say we have a problem . Then we try to solve the problem by lending some logic to the situation , which most probably involves finding a way to clear ones side from all possibilities of self implication , or implication by others for that matter . Then would begin the endless cycle of creating and solving ones own problems . Someone wise must have said ( most probably in a much funnier and interesting manner ) "Once you try stop solving a problem and try to imagine it does not exist the problem may vanish into thin air"(something of that sort) .
Time on ones hand is the biggest enemy one may have during spates of such morosity , you sitting in class and dreaming up , concocting up broths of feelings and emotions ( yuck! ). But times like those offer us the least of choices . You are stuck there with no possibility of escape , with either you there by mistake or with you suffering the insufferable as a means to a favourable end ( like picking up spare attendance ) . Well then there is the chance of you finding a way to brush away the boredom with certain enjoyable class room activities like -
1) running a chat server ( passing paper chits )
2) art design ( drawing nude chicks )
3) cubism ( drawing cubes on the desk )
4) astronomy ( looking profusely at glamour stars of the class )
5) literature ( completing records/assignments )
or even
6) accupuncture ( rubbing your leg over your girls' - highly skilled personel will only be recruited ).
Well how misleading and pointless time can be ?
Time on ones hand is the biggest enemy one may have during spates of such morosity , you sitting in class and dreaming up , concocting up broths of feelings and emotions ( yuck! ). But times like those offer us the least of choices . You are stuck there with no possibility of escape , with either you there by mistake or with you suffering the insufferable as a means to a favourable end ( like picking up spare attendance ) . Well then there is the chance of you finding a way to brush away the boredom with certain enjoyable class room activities like -
1) running a chat server ( passing paper chits )
2) art design ( drawing nude chicks )
3) cubism ( drawing cubes on the desk )
4) astronomy ( looking profusely at glamour stars of the class )
5) literature ( completing records/assignments )
or even
6) accupuncture ( rubbing your leg over your girls' - highly skilled personel will only be recruited ).
Well how misleading and pointless time can be ?
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